- Exhaustion and doubt during retreat : Leo discusses the mental exhaustion and frustration experienced on the fifth day of the retreat, feeling less conscious despite rigorous meditation, leading to moments of doubt and the temptation to quit but ultimately staying the course.
- Encountering varied meditation experiences : He had contrasting sessions, with some powerful moments of self-inquiry and a notable 'do nothing' session leading to a peaceful state, juxtaposing the struggle of using structured techniques versus the ease of surrendering control.
- Reconciling meditation techniques : Leo reflects on the struggle between effortful and effortless meditation methods, contemplating the supposed goal of meditation as a process of enjoyment and quieting the mind rather than a masochistic pursuit, and how the right method may vary by personal disposition.
- Contemplating disciplined vs. conceptual life : The tension between a disciplined, unthinking state and the enjoyment derived from conceptual, creative thought is discussed, with Leo questioning the desirability of completely shutting off his mind, even though it may not align with the Zen pursuit of 'no mind'.
- Handling sexual cravings in solitude : Leo explores two strategies for dealing with sexual urges during retreats: the hardcore yogi approach of complete celibacy and the pragmatic approach of quickly addressing and moving past cravings. He recommends the latter for those not heavily afflicted by such desires for greater efficiency in returning focus to the retreat.
- Transmutation and Retention of Sexual Energy : Leo discusses various methods to manage sexual urges, including transmuting sexual energy and retaining it for spiritual practices. However, he is uncertain about the necessity of total abstinence for achieving awakening experiences and acknowledges that personal factors like age and sexual constitution greatly influence one's experience and discipline.
- Dealing with Persistent Sexual Cravings : Awareness of the persistence of sexual cravings despite spiritual advancements is highlighted. Leo advises developing coping strategies and not presuming that enlightenment or awakening experiences will eliminate these natural desires.
- Setting and Adhering to Ground Rules : Emphasizes the importance of establishing ground rules for a retreat to avoid distractions and maintain discipline. Leo shares his own set of strict rules designed to foster an environment conducive to meditation and self-reflection.
- Psychological Anticipation and Reality : Leo reflects on the dichotomy between pre-retreat excitement and the challenges that arise when actually on retreat. Understanding this can help prevent giving into desires to escape the discomforts that come with intensive meditation practice.
- Recognizing and Managing One's Breaking Point : Leo stresses the importance of recognizing personal limits and allowing for relaxation before reaching a breaking point during a retreat. This knowledge helps avoid potential backsliding that might undo the progress made.
- Persistence of the Ego in Maintaining Stability : A discussion on the ego's inherent drive to maintain stability and survival, and how this can both support life and simultaneously make significant, lasting changes in consciousness challenging to sustain without regression.
- Expectation Management and Motivation : Leo talks about the pattern of having difficult days followed by a sense of release or 'second wind,' but also cautions against expecting repetition of easy days as it can lead to disappointment and a downward motivational spiral. He closes by emphasizing the continuous need to navigate one's inner challenges and maintain motivation throughout the retreat process.